Colin Montgomerie Doesn't Find Shooting 84 as Funny as the Rest of Us

One of the subplots heading into this week's PGA Championship was whether Scotland's Colin Montgomerie would finally win a major. Okay, I'm kidding; nobody -- not even Monty -- was working from the assumption that he had a chance in hell, but a good showing at the final major of the 2008 season would go a long way in cementing his spot on the European Ryder Cup team.

Well, if Montgomerie could've better ruined those chances, I'm not sure how he would've gone about doing it.

Montgomerie shot a 14-over 84 Friday in the second round of the PGA Championship at Oakland Hills, then snapped at a reporter who chuckled during one of his answers. "Make that your last laugh," the Scotsman said.

He is trying to play his way on to his eighth straight European Ryder Cup team and hurt his chances with a 20-over 160 total that missed the cut by more than 10 shots and had him in front of only five players, all PGA club professionals.

Mrs. Doubtfire strikes an imposing figure, so when he tells you to quick mocking him, you better pay heed. Or not,whatever. But, yeah, generally speaking, a 20-over two-day performance is abysmal.

Monty wasn't the only player from the United Kingdom bellyaching this week,however; after firing a opening round 77, Lee Westwood ripped the PGA and -- wait for it -- the course set up. Pretty original, that.

"The course is 7,500 yards long, the greens are firm, and the pins are tucked away," Westwood said of Oakland Hills. "They are sucking the fun out of the major championships when you set it up like that. The fairways are narrow, and unfortunately if you miss the semi [rough] by a foot you are worse off than if you miss by 20 yards.

Hey, Lee, how about you quit exaggerating. The course is only playing 7,395 yards. Sheesh.